Dinner for two
Not the microwave kind of popcorn. Not the dripping-down-your-wrists on a summer day and spitting-out-the-seeds kind of watermelon either. Cut the watermelon into one-bite squares.
Orville Redenbacher from a jar. 2 TBS of sunflower oil and a quarter cup of kernels into my big Revere Ware pan with black handles on each side. Heat on medium. The corn is situated so each kernel has its own space. Like a bus, overcrowding is bad.
Lid cracked to let out the steam. This is KEY. The popping starts slowly. (This is an instance when an adverb works.) Shake the pan a little to move the corn in the hot oil. Remain calm. Don’t turn up the heat.
The popping quickens and becomes sporadic. Turn off the flame. Or remove pot from burner; I’m sorry, if you have an electric stove. Electric burners are slow responders, and who wants them? I know I know. All opinions have opposing and sometimes valid views.
The lid has stayed cracked open the entire time you hear the pinging of exploding kernels. No soggy popcorn. Let the popcorn rest a minute after that hard exercise. While the popcorn catches its breath, melt as much butter as your conscience allows. Pour over the popcorn and salt generously with sea salt, kosher salt, you know, good salt. Try to divide evenly and not give one person more than the other. There might be words. Popcorn has been known to fly through the air, although that’s mostly for the dog.
After finishing off the popcorn, spear the juicy seedless watermelon with a fork. Or start with the watermelon as first course. Or alternate bites of popcorn and fruit- salt then sweet then salt…. So many choices.
Start the first episode of Modern Love Season 2 with Minnie Driver at any point. There’s a cool blue sports car involved.